On Mars, there are all kinds of mutants, which is where the girl with three boobs comes into play. There are a lot of great things about this movie. He “gets his ass to Mars” and saves the day! Yay! Actually, he saves the whole planet, but that is just what Arnold does when he goes on a mission. Quaid spends the whole movie trying to remember his old life and figure out why everyone is trying to kill him. Total Recall takes place in the future when people are living on all the different planets. Oh did I mention that his wife, Lori, was played by Sharon Stone? Not too bad for Arnold, eh? Being an actor must be soooo tough having to make out with other hot actors all day long. He was given a pretend wifey in his new life that he gets to boink all day long. Total Recall is about Quaid (Arnold), a guy who was a really bad man and then he had his memory erased and became a big softy. He is definitely what is so awesome about all of these flicks. You know he’s a great man because if you take him out of all the movies he has done, they would’ve fallen flat on their faces (with a few exceptions maybe). Total Recall stars the great man I am honoring this month: ARNOLD SCHWARZENEGGER. Okay, for those of you who don’t know what I’m talking about then you obviously haven’t seen Total Recall and I probably seem especially weird to you right now. Ohh, the humanity! Let’s all just take a moment of silence to remember our great friend… Triple Nipple Girl. I just witnessed possibly the greatest tragedy I have seen in any motion picture: The woman with the three boobs was shot…and killed.
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February 2023
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